Maybe I should take a step back and give a bit more information.... My father a
wonderful and community minded man, not to mention a cycling enthusiast, he sat
me down about a month ago and said.
"Do you want to do a short bike ride for charity?"
The lessen to be learnt for today, if a 67 seven year bike mad father ever says
the phrase short bike ride, turn and run for the hills because it means months
of training, blood sweat and a work synonymous with profanity..... Exercise.
I open the welcome pack forwarded on by email, and the eyes bulge, surely this
is a typo, uming and and arghing whether it is the distance or the phone number
I am staring at it, 700 kilometers, 5 days, the mental maths churning in my
head, that's about 140 kilometers a day... I have been hoodwinked, by a grey
haired Loki of the Bicycle underworld.
Don't get me wrong I am more than willing to do my bit for those in need, and I
am not exactly unfit, I'm 24 and built like a grey hound (after a month of
starvation), but the thought of 700 kms glued to a bike seat did not sound like
"Dad this bike ride, is there a typo in the heading? There seems to be a couple
of extra 0s after the 7."
"No its 700 hundred last year was a lot shorter, that was only 500.."
So after the shock of the email, my only course of action became clear, I need
From This To This
Via this and this
So I bought a pair of bike shorts, (as stated below the only contraceptive to be
made out of lycra), you know the type, the one with the sanitary pad stitched
into the base. Makes you feel like there has been an unfortunate accident,
involving too many prunes. Every day for the last month I have completed a 20 km
(min) bike ride, on an old Malvern star more of an iron oxide deposit than an
actual bike, and approximately 16 kilometers on foot, amongst day to day walking
and fitness. A massive change in diet, moving from the see food diet (I see food
I eat it), to controlled diet fresh fruit and vegetables, and healthy soups. No
fast food, no soft drink, no lollies, or sweet things and a tonne of water
daily. A true health nut for a month. My legs are getting huge and I lost my
puppy fat, I have gone from the one pack to a 4 pack, if I stand up really
straight, and squint:-)
My bottom however is feeling the burn, bruised and batters, and the permanent
impression of a bike seat between the cheeks. Now with only 10 days to go, my
legs march on with much apprehension and dread, in a circular motion toward the
700 kilometers that await.
Despite my complaints and sore muscles it is all in a good cause funds will
support the following...
Life Education Victoria
Gippsland Centenary House
Wish me Luck
Keep 'em spinning