Sunday, January 28, 2007

In my dreams I see a beach, it is night time, I can see a few paces in front but from there it all fades to darkness. In front of me I see a trail made of foot prints stretching into the darkness, glowing silver as if lit by the moon, the outline glowing against the darkness. I take a step it lands in the pre made foot print in front, every step lands, as if guided by some unseen force into the pre existing foot steps. I try and hold my feet in position not take that next step but I am pushed on, I reach for the sand to slow the momentum, my actions; futile, the steps must continue on. Every step I take is inevitable and leading inescapably into the ominous darkness.

Please forgive my flair for the melodramatic; however two days ago I was struck with the thought as if for the first time… One day I will grow old and One day I will die. I picture my death bed confession, of social upheaval and the destruction of consumerism at my hand. Then reality kicks in and it will be more along the lines of "it seemed like a good idea at the time."

The stupidest part of it all, was what brought the thought on, something so simple. I saw my mother and fathers wedding photo next to the photo of Stace and I on our wedding day. From there I saw a cycle, another life moving forward, the other life slowing down. Eventually my life will slow down, one day my life will end, all that will be left are photos, bizarre blog posts, and my organs transplanted into those who need them.

I have discussed absurdity previously but I see with a whole new clarity, why live why fight for ideals, if one day all that remains is dust. Yet my resolve is strengthened for the same reasons. One day I won't be here to fight, one day only the memories of the fight will remain. All that I loved will one day cease to be.

Live your life, make your obituary as interesting as possible, one day they may even remember that you were here.


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10:19 PM  
Blogger Aidan said...

interesting point i must say... although possibly a little off topic...

10:26 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...


Very astute and forward-thinking for someone as young, virile and indestructible as you.

At least I always thought I was always indestructible at your age. And still do, for that matter.

The biggest thing you said, after revealing your own glimpse at the future, was your resolve nevertheless to make a difference.

This is especially apropos for me as I was thinking the other day -- and I may post about it -- is my own thoughts or dreams about what my funeral will be like and who will be there and won't be.

And what would be said.

You are wise beyond your years, Aidan of Australia. However, because you have not switched to the new blogger, I have to sign in as anonymous...


3:09 PM  
Blogger Keshi said...

what a beautiful post and a profound message!

** I saw my mother and fathers wedding photo next to the photo of Stace and I on our wedding day

such things make u wonder ha.

I always say to myself that Im just a passing day I will not be here and only my memories will remain. I often wonder if anyone wud remember me. But then again, as long as I lived my life well and left alot of love on Earth, thats all that matters. Cos ppl die...their love wont.

Stay gold mate! And I will always rem u no matter what...that's if u go before me ;-)


5:15 PM  
Blogger Aidan said...

Means i should have to upgrade....

Thanks you for your words, very kind. I used to have a dream funeral as a kid... I always wanted a Jumping castle at my funeral... It should be a celebration and truly enjoyable, not people sitting about moping... I want a send off were people, gee he was a pain in the butt while alive, but his send off rocked...

I guess i think too much some days..

6:48 PM  
Blogger Aidan said...

KESHI: People die there love wont.... i like that.
No one is truly dead if someone remembers your name. I guess it the same idea. Imortality through memory.

It is always little thing with me. Small things mess my head up.

**the previous comment was for WW**

6:55 PM  
Blogger Keshi said...

**Imortality through memory.

true. Atleast until they r alive, we will be remembered :)


7:26 PM  
Blogger Keshi said...

Aidan matey check ur BALLS post's comment section :):)


7:28 PM  
Blogger Ces said...

Talk about discovering talent in the blogs, this is the first one I found today. I also would like to confirm that more often than not, most people I know think of the same things. In fact the other day I was writing my epitaph. It was very boring so I nixed it. Maybe next time.

5:42 AM  
Anonymous donn the escapeon said...

Hey Aidan this is Homo Escapeons trying to reach you but Blogger keeps sending me to my f*@king dashboard so I'll try this....

OK ((sigh))
I am going to write my own fascinating Obit because it is the only time that you can appear to be even more perfect than you do on your Resume.

Kesh is right,
if you leave them wanting more instead of
them wanting you to leave
you have been a Great Success!

You have a lot of miles left on your tires so relax.
Hey when it's your time to go there is nothing that you can do about it any..((agggrhhh CrAsH! THUD))

12:28 PM  
Blogger Keshi said...

HE why r ya in a burkha? :)


6:49 PM  
Blogger Aidan said...

CES: thanks for dropping by... I always wanted my epitaph to read... " I told You I was Sick"

HE: thanks i know i have a fair bit of natural life ahead of me, i hope i can do as much as possible with it. Hopefully something meaningfull.

5:45 PM  

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