In the darkest of times there have always been heroes. Lancelot in the dark
ages, Joan of Arc against the English, people who have always shined through and
been a example of times of peril. Their acts Selfless and noble, fighting for a
cause that they believed in. As we progressed so did our heroes, war created
heroes to bring hope to soldiers facing overwhelming odds, the socialist agenda
created those who would sacrifice a life filled with wanton hedonism: to better
the human race through science (Watson & Crick, Blaise Pascal, Isaac Newton, and
big Papa E), or social progress (Mother Teresa, Bill Gates) or both (Fred
Then along came the action figure; heroes immoratalised in plastic...
Plastic versions of our great heroes, the selfless acts of GI Joe defending the
free world from Communism and sharing. Barbie Dolls showing the young women of
our generation that even the blondest and biggest breasted could still be
doctors and Lawyers. We could recreate adventures and feelings of hope, we could
prove to the prosthetic world that there was a little hero in all of us, and the
forces of evil were no match for our spring loaded Weapons of Mass destruction.
Now our heroes side with the enemy. The biggest offender is of course the Bratz
doll. Selfless acts replaced with consumerism. A compliant consumer, looking the
same as all her friends, with no greater aspirations than to look pretty and
purchase happiness. Gone are acts of bravery; gone are acts of kindness to make
the world a better place. We are left with Bimbos whose sole purpose is too look
like everyone else, talk like everyone else, and consume like everyone else. IS
this the role model we should be giving our youth?
My favorite action figure: The Albert Einstein doll comes with action cardigan
and chalk to fight the forces of calculus. I have a strange feeling that Albert
has been assembled from other products, a troll doll head and the body of a Ken
doll that had let itself go. This is the role model we should give our kids.
Albert Einstein March 14 1879- April 18 1955.
Nobel prize recipient in 1921 for physics, and best known for the theory
E=MC2*(super script and blogger don't mix)
*Better known as Einstein went to the Moscow Circus Twice.*
Which relates energy and mass in the universe and explains how energy is
transferred in nuclear Fission reactions... small loss of mass = heap of energy
due to the speed of light square.
This may also explain why Second hand bookshops become a black hole which no
book can escape.. Knowledge=power=energy=Mass.... Mass distorts the region of
space-time and attracts more matter. Hence why second hand bookshops
(collection of knowlege) take great lengths (cracked floors, dimly lit, and
dank) to not actually sell any books, as it may adversely effect the space-time
We are in times of turmoil.... a world of apathy and selfishness. Our world is
slowly destroying itself, evil runs unchecked, people cry out in the night but
no one comes to their aid. The heroes of old are dead and gone, leaving only a
memory of times in which we had hope, now we know there is none left. We need a
new hero; a hero who shrugs off consumerism, who is happy to wear non designer,
who questions everything, who is not content just to watch the world destroy
itself... If he existed would the masses even listen.
Solution: The bureaucrat action figure; more powerful than an electric stapler,
able to chop red tape in a single swipe, equipped with a bullshit awareness
sensor... someone who could reform the system a give us hope once again.
Until then, I will continue to play with Albert and his bizarre love triangle
with Barbie and her open-minded twin sister.